"Joe Pesci had a quite different appearance from when he had last visited the Empire. He now had a thick, grey beard and wrinkly skin. When he arrived in Pesci square, he stood up in front of the crowds on the great mound upon which the great scale stood, but nobody even noticed. They didn’t recognize him. And so he yelled out, “My children! It is I, Joe Pesci, the Son of the Lord and the Lord Himself. I have come to be your Teacher and your Guide! Come learn from Me and worship My Father!”
Several bystanders heard Him, but did not recognize Him, and so they yelled out, “BLASPHEMY!!! KILL THIS HORRIBLE FALSE PROPHET WHO IS MOCKING JOE PESCI, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR!!! BURN HIM AT THE STAKE!!! TORTURE AND BEHEAD HIM!!! HE MUST DIE A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH!!!”
Joe Pesci was quite angry, but He was able to hold it in, for He had achieved Inner Peace. “Children, I shall forgive you for this disrespect, for you probably do not recognize me. But indeed it is Me, Joe Pesci, your Lord and Savior. If you see your wrongdoing and repent, We can just pretend like this never happened.”
“UTTER BLASPHEMY!!!” yelled the bystanders who had now grown into a much larger group. “WE MUST KILL THIS WICKED MAN WHO HAS BLASPHEMED AGAINST THE LORD!!!”
There were half a million people in the city of Dan. Deep down, most were good-hearted, practicing Pescists, but mob syndrome is quite a powerful thing. Quite soon, thousands of people were standing around the mound chanting, “OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!”
Pesci called upon advice from His Father. He said, “Father, they do not believe that I am Your Son. How can I convince them?”
The Lord responded, “THEY ALL SHALL DIE, FOR THEY ARE THE TRUE BLASPHEMERS!!!” And then He smote everyone who was chanting in the mob. He then burned their families and destroyed several neighborhoods just for good measure. Then He said unto His Son, “My Son, you must go to a barber, and ask him to shave off your beard. Then they will surely recognize You!”
And so Pesci listened to His Father, and went to see a barber, making sure not to try to convince him of His divinity. After shaving off Pesci’s beard, the barber recognized him, and subsequently had a heart attack and died, for he was so overjoyed that his Lord had returned. His soul then ascended into the Overworld, for he had lived his life as a faithful Pescist.
Pesci then walked out onto the street, and the people rejoiced, chanting out his name: “PESCI!!! PESCI!!! PESCI!!! OUR LORD HAS RETURNED!!!”On that day, the Lord had smote about 50,000 blasphemers, but the day went down in history as a good day, for it was the day that Pesci returned to earth."
The first item(Parts I-III) on the submenu of The Truth is a three-part preview of the complete, twenty-part glory of The Truth.